Sunday, May 09, 2004

Warning bells rang out today as an old friend called and accused me of turning into a boring person. Rest assured Madame, your warning has been acknowledged and an upgrade is being worked on even as I write. A fresh as mint, witty as a cucumber version of me is on his way. This bold new me is taller, darker, more handsome, and comes in three new flavors -- maniac mango, brain seizure banana and my personal favorite, strawberry nutcase. I'll be available in all quality boyfriend stores soon, and also in my new online me store, myTunes. Old customers will get a volume discount, so keep those old receipts handy!

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